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8456 No. 8456
The urge to get to some place warm is lost in an instant as you look at the foggy grounds of this place. The crisp air, the cold ground, and the fog itself tempt you into staying out here, so that you can continue to play the flute. After another look up into the sky, you notice that the three figures have disappeared without a trace.

“Huh…” You scratch your head. “Where did they…”

A push to your side reminds you of your ghastly companion, and you laugh as it twirls about you.

“You really like my playing, don’t you?”

Nyom nods violently, the red on the surface of this thing expanding to make a line on its face. You pat the poor blob, laughing.

“Okay, okay. Let me get ready.”

After placing your fingers on the holes of the flute, and placing your mouth on the mouthpiece, you begin to blow into it. You don’t really have to focus on the movements of your fingers, as they seem to move on their own, as if some kind of power was leading your fingers along the hard pole. The song that you play sounds odd, sort of like a happy-go-lucky tune, which would probably be better with more instruments to accompany it.

You continue to play, the odd fog seemingly spinning about, moving around as you play. Another sound begins to pick up, and you merely ignore it at first. But then the sound grows louder, and you could swear that a piano, trumpet, and possibly a violin. You turn your head, and you are then met with the sight of three girls, all playing the instruments that you thought were just in your head.

“Uh…”

The flute begins to fall out of your mouth, almost slipping from your hands. The tallest of the three, a blonde girl wearing a black outfit, winks at you as she continues to play her instrument. After a second of silence, you once again begin to play the flute, following along with this strange song that the other three people are playing. You soon come to what appears to be the climax of the song, and then pant as you hold the flute tightly in one hand, and hold your chest with the other.

“So.” The blonde girl speaks up, holding out a hand. “Who are you, and how did you know our favorite song?”

[ ] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
[ ] Make up a fake name and tell them that the song just came to you.
[ ] “Shouldn’t you introduce yourself before asking for another’s name?”

>> No. 8458
[x] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
>> No. 8459
[x] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
>> No. 8460
{X} Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
>> No. 8462
Hallelujah St. Jesus, it's an update!

>as if some kind of power was leading your fingers along the hard pole.
I like the delicious innuendo as much as the next pervert, but this line was overdoing it. "along the shaft" would probably have been a bit more subtle.
And subtlety is what the best innuendo is all about.

>You soon come to what appears to be the climax of the song, and then pant as you hold the flute tightly in one hand
Yes, like that. Much better.

[x] Shake her hand, and give a cute smile. "My name is Aoi Watarase. But as for the song... I don't really know. It sort of ...came onto me."
[x] "I only started playing just yesterday, though. You really think I'm good, though?" Look bashfully at her, and then back down at the ground.
And after all the explanations:
[x] "I suppose I should have asked earlier, but where am I? And have you seen a lady with a bunch of tails?"
>> No. 8463
[ ] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
>> No. 8464
[x] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.

Blug blug.
>> No. 8469
[x] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
>> No. 8472
[ ] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
>> No. 8476
>“Who are you, and how did you know our favorite song?”

[x] "My birth name is Aoi Watarase, and my stage name is Mango Reinhardt, but you can just call me by the familiar name Watako."
[x] Curtsy.
[x] "And I know that song because 'Sweet Georgia Brown' is my favorite song too."

JAZZ FLUTE IS FOR LITTLE FAIRY BOYS
>> No. 8480
[x] "My birth name is Aoi Watarase, and my stage name is Mango Reinhardt, but you can just call me by the familiar name Watako."
[x] Curtsy.
[x] "And I know that song because 'Sweet Georgia Brown' is my favorite song too."

heh.
>> No. 8481
[x] "My birth name is Aoi Watarase, and my stage name is Mango Reinhardt, but my friends just call me Watako."
[x] Curtsy.
[x] "And I know that song because 'Sweet Georgia Brown' is my favorite song too."

Edited slightly for dramatic effect.

I hope they don't make us their SAX SLAVE!
>> No. 8482
[ ] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
>> No. 8483
[+] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
>> No. 8484
[x] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
>> No. 8485
[x] "My birth name is Aoi Watarase, and my stage name is Mango Reinhardt, but you can just call me by the familiar name Watako."
[x] Curtsy.
[x] "And I know that song because 'Sweet Georgia Brown' is my favorite song too."

Why the fuck not?

Also:
>[x] Curtsy
Geniusgeniusgeniusgeniusgeniusgenius
>> No. 8486
[z] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.

Name tellan gaems
>> No. 8487
[ ] “Shouldn’t you introduce yourself before asking for another’s name?”
>> No. 8488
[x] "My birth name is Aoi Watarase, and my stage name is Mango Reinhardt, but my friends just call me Watako."
[x] Curtsy.
[x] "And I know that song because 'Sweet Georgia Brown' is my favorite song too."

JAZZ is like a Jello pudding pop--no!
JAZZ is like Kodak film--no!
JAZZ is like the New Coke. It'll be around forever!
>> No. 8489
[x] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
>> No. 8490
[x] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.

It's a times like these that I wish the main character wasn't a trap. Or all the time.
>> No. 8491
[x] "My birth name is Aoi Watarase, but my friends just call me Watako."
[x] Curtsy.
[x] "And I know that song because 'Sweet Georgia Brown' is my favorite song too."

>>8490
>It's a times like these that I wish the main character wasn't a trap. Or all the time.
...Then why the FUCK are you reading this story, and polluting it with your vote?
>> No. 8492
[x] "My birth name is Aoi Watarase, and my stage name is Fizzy Gillespie, but my friends just call me Watako."
[x] Curtsy.
[x] "And I know that song because 'Sweet Georgia Brown' is my favorite song too."
>> No. 8493
[x] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
>> No. 8494
>>8492
[x] "My birth name is Aoi Watarase, and my stage name is "John Cola-Trane", but my friends just call me Watako."
[x] Curtsy.
[x] "And I know that song because 'Sweet Georgia Brown' is my favorite song too."

awesome.jpg
>> No. 8496
{X} Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
>> No. 8500
[x] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
Don't like the write-in that much.
>> No. 8503
[x] "My birth name is Aoi Watarase, but my friends just call me Watako."
[x] Curtsy.
[x] "And I know that song because 'Sweet Georgia Brown' is my favorite song too."

http://youtube.com/watch?v=VX9v5YYtB2k

ITT: JAZZ
>> No. 8506
[x] "My birth name is Aoi Watarase, and my stage name is Mango Reinhardt, but my friends just call me Watako."
[x] Curtsy.
[x] "And I know that song because 'Sweet Georgia Brown' is my favorite song too."
>> No. 8507
[x] "My birth name is Aoi Watarase, and my stage name is Mango Reinhardt, but my friends just call me Watako."
[x] Curtsy.
[x] "And I know that song because 'Sweet Georgia Brown' is my favorite song too."
>> No. 8508
[x] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
>> No. 8511
[x] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
>> No. 8516
[x] "My birth name is Aoi Watarase, but my friends just call me Watako."
[x] Curtsy.
[x] "And I know that song because 'Sweet Georgia Brown' is my favorite song too."

The curtsy emphasizes that we're a girl.
>> No. 8531
[+] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
>> No. 8540
[X] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
>> No. 8554
[X] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.

Jazz is shit, and you should be ashamed.
>> No. 8555
>>8554
>I hate music.
Well, to each his own, I guess.

[X] "My birth name is Aoi Watarase, and my stage name is Mango Reinhardt, but my friends just call me Watako."
[X] Curtsy.
[X] "And I know that song because 'Sweet Georgia Brown' is my favorite song too."
>> No. 8556
>>8554
>Jazz is shit, and you should be ashamed.

Perhaps the same could be said of all religions?
>> No. 8557
>>8556
Your words are as empty as your taste in music!

[v] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
>> No. 8563
>>8557

What is music? A miserable pile of notes! But enough talk...

[x] "My birth name is Aoi Watarase, but my friends just call me Watako."
[x] Curtsy.
[x] "And I know that song because 'Sweet Georgia Brown' is my favorite song too."
>> No. 8566
Equip: Holy Water
Item Crush

[ ] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
[ ] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
[ ] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
[ ] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
[ ] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
[ ] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
[ ] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.
[ ] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you.

(disregard this post for purposes of counting votes. I am just fucking around.)
>> No. 8568
>>8566

"HYDRO STORM!"
>> No. 8570
[x] "My name is Aoizymandias, Trap of Traps: look on my body, ye Mighty, and despair!"
>> No. 8571
>>8570
>look on my penis, ye Mighty, and despair!
fixed
>> No. 8574
[ ] Tell them your name and explain that you have no idea how that song came to you. won.

Writing now.
>> No. 8576
Small update.

-----------------

You grab her hand and give it a firm shake, smiling as you do so.

“My name is Aoi Watarase, but my friends call me Watako.”

The girl smiles and returns your strong handshake.

“My name is Lunasa Prismriver. The girl with blue hair is Merlin Prismriver, and the other one is Lyrica Prismriver.”

“H-hey!” The smaller, red haired girl steps over to her sister, huffing as she does so. “The ‘other’ one? That’s not nice, Lunasa!”

The taller girl, ‘Lunasa’, laughs, patting Lyrica’s shoulder. Oddly enough, you feel like you’ve heard these names before. The two sisters bicker a bit, and the blue-haired girl steps toward you. Her arms are folded in front of her, in a rather humble way.

“So,” The other two fall silent as ‘Merlin’ speaks. “How did you know that song? We’ve never told anyone outside of the mansion about how to play it, and it takes a real musical genius to play something that they might have only heard once or twice.”

You shrug your shoulders, completely baffled. Just how did you know that song? Was it some kind of hidden memory, or maybe a long-lost feeling making itself known through this pipe-like instrument that you play?

“I… I really have no idea. I just started to play the song, though I had no idea that it was so important to you.”

The eldest sister steps forward and places her hands on her hips, smiling brightly at you.

“Well, it takes some kind of soul to play ‘Phantom Ensemble’. I figure that we could let you come in for a while, right Lyrica, Merlin?”

The other sisters nod, and then seem to fly as they rush at you, scooping you up by your arms. Lunasa guides the three of you into the Mansion, whose doors open without anybody’s help, and close in the same fashion.

The inner workings of the Mansion make it look much more refined than the outside would lead one to believe. The floor is glossy and polished, and two staircases lead up to a second floor. All of the walls have a nice cream color to them, and various entrances and exits to multiple hallways can be seen from your point of view, which happens to be in the air. You look up to see a large chandelier hanging over your head, swinging slightly. Merlin and Lyrica continue to hold your arms, heading back down to the ground.

“Well then,” Lunasa speaks up. “Your clothing looks ruined, and you also look dirty. I’d say that a nice bath followed by a change of clothes and a good meal is in order.”

The other sisters laugh as they set you down, letting you face the hovering Lunasa. A million questions buzz around in your head as you look on at the levitating girl.

[ ] Ask her something.
- [ ] Ask how they can fly.
- [ ] Ask her about the Mansion.
[ ] Take a bath first.
[ ] Eat first.
>> No. 8577
[ ] Ask her something.
- [ ] Ask how they can fly.
>> No. 8578
[x] Ask how they can fly.
[x] Ask her about the Mansion.
"How did you do that?" "Where am I?"

then
[x] Take a bath.
>> No. 8579
[x] Ask her something.
[x] Ask how they can fly.
>> No. 8580
[x] Ask how they can fly.
[x] Ask her about the Mansion.
>> No. 8581
[x] Ask how they can fly.
[x] Ask her about the Mansion.
"How did you do that?" "Where am I?"

then
[x] Take a bath.

OSHI- IT'S THE END OF DAYS
9 UPDATED
>> No. 8583
[x] Ask how they can fly.
[x] Ask her about the Mansion.
"How did you do that?" "Where am I?"

then
[x] Take a bath.
>> No. 8596
[x] Ask how they can fly.
[x] Ask her about the Mansion.
"How did you do that?" "Where am I?"

then
[x] Take a bath.
>> No. 8598
[x] Ask how they can fly.
[x] Ask her about the Mansion.
"How did you do that?" "Where am I?"

then
[x] Take a bath.
>> No. 8599
I'm probably going to take a break for some time. I've lost my will to write anything, and, honestly, I just don't care about this at the moment.
>> No. 8625
>>8595
Proving again that writefags should never attempt to judge their own stories.
>> No. 8642
[x] Take a bath.
[x] Wash yourself.
[x] Take a bath.
[x] Show me what you're scrubbin' with.
>> No. 8646
[X] Ask how they can fly.
[X] Ask her about the Mansion.
"How did you do that?" "Where am I?"

then
[X] Take a bath

Copy-pastan gaems

>>8595 >>8599
;_;
>> No. 8674
>>8625
Hummm, I don't know, he may be right if he's referring to parts of the story we haven't reached yet. We still seem to be at the "beginning" after all. Maybe the midstory and conclusion are very loose and badly defined.
>> No. 8730
[x] Ask how they can fly.
[x] Ask her about the Mansion.
[x] Ask about a fox-tailed woman
"How did you do that?" "Where am I?" "Have you seen a lady with poofy tails or a girl in a hat who looks like a guy?"

then
[x] Take a bath.

Oh god bath scene.
Bath scene with Nyom.
The anticipation is making me fap.
>> No. 8731
[x] Take a bath with Nyom.
>> No. 8811
Writing.
>> No. 8812
>>8811

hooray.jpg
>> No. 8813
File 121703271349.jpg - (31.60KB , 360x516 , Lunasa1.jpg ) [iqdb]
8813
“Uh… I’ll take a bath first, I guess.”

The girl nods and takes your hand, leading you up the stairs and into a hallway. She seems to be walking on her feet rather than float like she was just a minute ago, and she keeps a strong grip on your hand as the two of you make your way down the hall.

“…Lunasa, is it?” The girl nods, and turns her head to look at you as she walks. “Yeah, that’s me. What is it?”

“I was wondering… why are you and your sisters able to fly like that?”

“Oh, that?” She presses a finger to her cheek and gazes up. “Well, we just kind of do. It’s inherent for a poltergeist, I guess.”

A poltergeist? You can’t help but wonder if she’s kidding or not, since the events that have happened lately… might just make this a lot more believable. You decide that you might as well drop the subject for the time being.

“So, what’s up with this place? It’s a huge mansion, and yet it seems like there’s nobody else here; not even a groundskeeper to take care of the walls and shrubbery.”

The two of you come to a large hole in the floor, which leads down to the room below. The large gap has apparently consumed the hall from wall to wall, and there seems to be no other holes above or below it.

“Come on.”

She suddenly scoops you up in her arms, and carries you over the gap. You lose your breath as she sets you down on the other side of the large thing, letting you touch the ground softly. The two of you begin to go down the hallway once more with no obstacles to block your way.

“Well, this place is like this because my sisters and I are the only ones who live here.”

“Wha-” You look at her in shock. “Really? There’s no one else?”

Lunasa shakes her head, ushering you into another period of silence. You eventually stop in front of a door which Lunasa opens up. Inside you see a well sized bathroom, with a tub, sink, toilet, and all the other basics for this kind of place. You walk in and look about, and then hear the door begin to shut.

“Wait!” You turn about. “I was wondering… why are you doing this for me?”

“Well…” Lunasa smiles meekly. “You remind me of someone I knew before. I’m not really sure why, but you do. Lucky for you, that person was someone that I liked.”

She shuts the door softly.

“I’ll bring you some clothes to change into soon. Just clean up while I’m gone.”

You sigh, turning about. It’s then that you notice that there’s only one small towel in this room, which would only be able to cover your waist and a little ways down.

[ ] Go get a bigger towel.
[ ] Take a shower.
[ ] Wander around the mansion.
>> No. 8815
[ ] Take a shower.

Holy shit, it's an update!
>> No. 8817
[ ] Go get a bigger towel.
>> No. 8818
[ ] Take a shower.
>> No. 8819
[ ] Take a shower.
>> No. 8820
[x] Take a shower.

Her penis is cute.
>> No. 8821
>Inside you see a well sized bathroom, with a tub

[x] Take a bath. With lots of suds.

penis hidan gaems
>> No. 8826
[ ] Take a shower.
>> No. 8828
[x]Take a shower.
>> No. 8829
[X] Take a shower. won.

Writing.
>> No. 8830
Small update.

---

Shrugging this off, you strip down and leave your pajamas on the counter in the room. You open the space under the counter to find an assortment of shampoos and soaps waiting for you to use them. After grabbing a bar of pink soap and a container of shampoo, you get in the shower, pulling the curtain up behind you. As it closes you hear a familiar sound against it.

“Myon!”

You turn to see the white blob apparently looking at you and your bare hide. The surface of its face begins to turn red again, and it backs out of the shower.

“Oh, come on. It’s not like it’ll be that embarrassing… Nyom?”

The reply is the sound of Nyom passing through the shower curtain, and floating up to rest on your head.

“Are you ready?”

You feel the thing wiggle up and down as you the shower nozzle on, and the warm water begins to fly down at you and the ghost. Little noises come from Nyom as you begin to run the bar of soap over your body, and lather it before letting the water take it away.

“Hey, get up.”

Nyom obeys and flies up as you begin to lather your hair with the shampoo. You let it sit for a minute before rinsing your hair, then repeating the process. After a bit more hair washing and back scrubbing you climb out of the shower, and then hear someone at the door.

“I brought you some clothes.” The voice sounds kind of young. “Can I come in and set them down?”

[ ] Put on the towel and let them come in.
[ ] Tell them to leave the clothes outside the door.
[ ] Hide in the shower and tell them to come in.
>> No. 8831
[ ] Hide in the shower and tell them to come in.
>> No. 8832
[ ] Put on the towel and let them come in.

KEIKAKU DOORI
>> No. 8833
[x] Put on the towel and let them come in.
[x] Cover your chest with Nyom.
>> No. 8835
[x] Hide in the shower and tell them to come in.

awesome.jpg
>> No. 8836
>Little noises come from Nyom as you begin to run the bar of soap over Nyom, and lather it before letting the water wash the suds away.

Fixed for HNNNNNNNNNNNNNGH.
>> No. 8837
[x] Hide in the shower and tell them to come in.
>> No. 8838
[x] Hide in the shower and tell them to come in.
>> No. 8839
[z] Hide in the shower and tell them to come in.

Shower hidan gaems.
>> No. 8841
[x] Hide in the shower and tell them to come in.
>> No. 8851
[x] Hide in the shower and tell them to come in.
>> No. 8853
[+] Hide in the shower and tell them to come in.
>> No. 8858
[x] Put on the towel and let them come in.

In before it slips off.

And Nine, I'm really happy to see you're active again. Welcome back.
>> No. 8859
[ ] Put on the towel and let them come in.
>> No. 8869
{X} Hide in the shower and tell them to come in.
>> No. 8872
[X] Put on the towel and let them come in.
>> No. 8873
[x] Put on the towel and let them come in.

NINE
WE CAN'T STOP HERE
THIS IS UPDATE COUNTRY
>> No. 8877
[x] Hide in the towel and let them leave the clothes in the shower.
>> No. 8879
[]Hide in the towel and tell the shower to come in them.
>> No. 8890
[ ] Hide in the shower and tell them to come in. won.

Writing.
>> No. 8891
“Uh.” You scramble back into the shower, not wanting anyone to see you naked. “S-sure! Come in.”

The door opens, and a small figure makes her way over to the counter, where she lays down a new pair of clothes, and takes away what you assume is the old pair. She quickly makes her way back over to the door, and turns around before leaving.

“I’ll go get these cleaned right away, Miss…?”

“Uh.” You clench onto the curtains, squeezing them as you reply. “My name is Aoi.”

“Okay, Miss Aoi. I’ll go get these washed now.”

The door shuts, and you once again climb out of the shower. That really was a close one. You’d rather not have anyone seeing your bare flesh, and… wait. Did she call you Miss Aoi? As in, a woman?

“Ooooh no.” You shake your head, holding a finger up to your forehead. “Ugh…”

It may be a good idea to sort that issue out later, or to merely let things go on as they are. You push these thoughts from your mind as you look at the new set of clothing, a black dress with various frills and bits of white on it. It almost seems like this, too, has that odd black aura about it, squirming and writhing in its place. It also seems familiar somehow, as if you had seen it before.

You dry off and begin to put the thing on, bloomers and all. The getup makes you look rather silly, though, looking in the mirror, it doesn’t look that bad on you. You let your hair down and stare at your reflection for a second, before leaving the room, Nyom in tow.

You make your way down the hallway, and soon find yourself at the large gap in the floor. Looking down, all you see is rubble and what looks like a large ebony piano sitting down below.

“Myon, myon.”

The mass of white presses up against your arm, making that silly noise as it does so. You’d like to get back to the foyer of this place somehow, and it may be best to just turn back.

[ ] Turn back; try another way.
[ ] Try to climb down on to the piano.
[ ] So crazy it might work; jump the gap!
>> No. 8893
[ ] Try to climb down on to the piano.
>> No. 8895
[ ] Try to climb down on to the piano.

This piano. It was made for me.
>> No. 8896
{X} Try to climb down on to the piano.

*squeeze*
>> No. 8897
[ ] Try to climb down on to the piano.
>> No. 8898
We're in the home of someone who greatly respects music. So, stepping on her piano is the best choice!

[ ] Turn back; try another way.
>> No. 8899
[x] So crazy it might work; jump the gap!

Walking on a musician's piano? I'll avoid the slow death and head for quick injury instead.
>> No. 8901
[x] Molest Nyom.
>> No. 8902
[x] So crazy it might work; jump the gap!

If there's one thing I learned in Super Mario 64, it's that YOU SHOULD STAY VERY FUCKING FAR AWAY FROM PIANOS IN HAUNTED HOUSES.
>> No. 8903
[x] So crazy it might work; jump the gap!
>> No. 8904
[x] So crazy it might work; jump the gap!
>> No. 8905
[z] So crazy it might work; jump the gap!

Gap jumpan gaems.
>> No. 8906
[+] So crazy it might work; jump the gap!
>> No. 8908
[X] Try and ride Nyom.

Fuck yeah, ghost chariot!
>> No. 8910
[x] Turn back; try another way.
Why are we in such a rush to the foyer anyway? Let's wander around and check out the house while we have an excuse (looking for a way down).

in b4 we try to jump and break the piano anyway and also our legs
>> No. 8912
[X] Try and ride Nyom.

ha ha oh wow
>> No. 8913
[x] So crazy it might work; jump the gap!
[x] Use Nyom as a parachute to slow your descent.
>> No. 8914
[X] Try and ride Nyom.
[x] But do a test run before doing it over the gap.
>> No. 8915
[x] Try and ride Nyom.
[x] But do a test run before doing it over the gap.
>> No. 8923
[ ] So crazy it might work; jump the gap! won.

Writing now.
>> No. 8925
>>8910
Or almost make it, but stab ourselves on a broken piece of wood because of the momentum.

And then become the fourth Prismriver.
>> No. 8927
File 121722311683.jpg - (105.29KB , 627x730 , Merlin1.jpg ) [iqdb]
8927
…No. Turning back now would just be a waste, and you can’t do that. If you get to the foyer, then it’ll be all the easier to find those sisters floating around. Looking at the obstacle before you, you swallow deeply. Are you really going to try and jump over this thing? This gapping hole in the floor, made by unknown means? Nodding slowly you back away, bracing yourself for flight.

Step. Step. Step.

You run at the large hole, ready to take on this challenge. You honestly can’t figure out just what has made you decide to do this, but you roll on with it, drawing closer and closer to the large hole, until you kick up, now soaring over it.

“Yaaaaaah!”

You can’t help but cry out as you pass over this thing, doing your best to clear it. The other side draws closer and closer, and you can almost land on the edge. Your course falls short, and you soon find yourself clinging to the edge of the hole, struggling to get up before you might fall into the room below.

“Wh-whaaaaa.” You utter a childish moan as you struggle up. “I don’t wanna faaaall…”

You push up and come to rest at the edge of the hole, almost crying from fright. After dabbing at your eyes a bit you stand, now making your way down the hall. Surely enough, the hall opens up into the foyer, which welcomes you with soft, glowing lights as you step into it.

“Hey, hey! You’re that silly person with the flute, right?”

You turn to see the blue haired girl, Merlin. She smiles, looking at you with her large, curious eyes.

“Hello?” She gives you a half-concerned and half-sarcastic look. “Hey, I don’t have time to wait. Answer meee…”

“Uh, uh…” You nod. “R-right. I’m hi- uh, her. Where are your other sisters?”

“Oh?”

The girl kicks one foot in the air bashfully, holding her hands behind her back. It’s just now that you notice her rather impressive chest size, which seems to be greater than that of her sister’s. She giggles and places her hands back in front of her, making her chest seem to be rather normal again.

“They’re in the dining hall, preparing some kind of food. They found another person lazing around here and decided to get her some food, too.”

“Eh?”

You shake your head. Another person lazing about the Mansion…?

[ ] Ask her about this person.
[ ] Ask her to take you to the dining hall.
[ ] Ask her where these clothes came from.
>> No. 8928
[ ] Ask her about this person.
[ ] Ask her to take you to the dining hall.
[ ] Ask her where these clothes came from.

WALLS
>> No. 8929
[+] Ask her about this person.
>> No. 8930
[ ] Ask her about this person.
[ ] Ask her to take you to the dining hall.
[ ] Ask her where these clothes came from.
>> No. 8931
[ ] Ask her about this person.
[ ] Ask her to take you to the dining hall.
[ ] Ask her where these clothes came from.

It must be done.
>> No. 8932
[ ] Ask her about this person.
>> No. 8933
[ ] Ask her about this person.
[ ] Ask her to take you to the dining hall.
[ ] Ask her where these clothes came from.
>> No. 8935
[ ] Ask her about this person.
[ ] Ask her to take you to the dining hall.
[ ] Ask her where these clothes came from.
>> No. 8936
[x] Ask her to take you to the dining hall.
[x] Ask her about this person.
[x] Ask her where these clothes came from.

Talk while you walk
>> No. 8937
[ ] Ask her about this person.
[ ] Ask her to take you to the dining hall.
[ ] Ask her where these clothes came from.
>> No. 8942
>>8936
Well put. I'd have done this myself if you hadn't.

[x] Ask her to take you to the dining hall.
[x] Ask her about this person.
[x] Ask her where these clothes came from.
>> No. 8957
We shant want to squander whatever will to write poor EX Nine has left, I say we get to the point.

[x] Ask her about this person
>> No. 8971
Updates?
>> No. 8978
If you're going to ask for a fucking grand wall of text, expect to wait a bit.
>> No. 8979
[x] Ask her about this person.
[x] Ask her to take you to the dining hall.

Hummmmm.
>> No. 9039
[X] Ask her about this person.
[X] Ask her to take you to the dining hall.
[X] Ask her where these clothes came from.

Tossin' it on the pile~
>> No. 9055
>>9051
Come on, you space nigger.
>> No. 9068
Updates where?
>> No. 9112
UPDATE.
>> No. 9113
He says his laptop charger cord is all fucked, but promises walls upon his return.

Unless he's pulling a fast one on us.
>> No. 9114
>>9113

Awesome. Then my waiting isn't in vain.
>> No. 9156
Useless bastard isn't going to update. He does NOTHING all day but play elona no matter how much we complain to him.

Expect something like 'lol I quit' sometime soon.
>> No. 9159
>>9156

Does that mean that one of us can take over this story?
>> No. 9163
>>9159

By all means.
>> No. 9168
>>9159
>Does that mean that one of us can take over this story?
DO IT. Start a new thread.
>> No. 9169
Nine: If you want to be unbanned, you'd better start updating this regularly.
>> No. 9170
>>9168>>9163>>9159
I've told Nine a few times on IRC that if he really, really wants to quit writing, I'll take his notes from him and continue it. It won't be the same, of course.
>> No. 9171
>>9170

Don't know if want...
>> No. 9172
What the fuck. My computer gives up the ghost, and I come here to see this. If you can't wait for me to get a new cable for my laptop, then go ahead, take this story as your own.

Not really, just be patient.
>> No. 9173
>>9172
Nigga, we are tired of waiting warmly, and we're about ready to prepare some girls and do their best.
ON YOUR ASS.

Or something like that. Just shake a goddamn leg already. If you can post, you can write.
Do it.
>> No. 9212
>>9172

You almost had me there.
>> No. 9215
Well, my computer should get the part I need on the 11th, so just wait for about... 5 or so days.
>> No. 9217
>>9215
>5 or so days.

The regular time for updates, we can wait.
>> No. 9218
>>9215

Fair enough
>> No. 9307
sage for shitty story on Patchwork's board
>> No. 9309
>>9307

Fucked that sage up. Sorry.
>> No. 9313
Due to IRL complications, I'll be gone for another week.

In fact, because of my poor skills in writing/making something good, I may or may not come back until I learn how to make an interesting and well-written story.

sage for bad writer
>> No. 9314
>>9307
>sage for shitty story

Yeah well, you know, that's just like, your opinion, man.

>>9313
>In fact, because of my poor skills in writing/making something good, I may or may not come back until I learn how to make an interesting and well-written story.

But this has been both interesting and well-written, unlike your first attempts--you just need to update more regularly.
>> No. 9315
>>9313
It is good that you see it for yourself now.
>>9314
lol why don't you kiss his ass more.
>> No. 9316
>>9309
>>9315

Samefag forgot his sage.
>> No. 9317
>>9313

Nice. Couldn't stand seeing the best and worst stories on the same board.
>> No. 9320
>>9318
0/10
>> No. 9322
>>9319
>> No. 9323
Yeah, this really was the worst CYOA on the boards. But now it's gone.

Good riddance.
>> No. 9325
>I don't go into Patchwork's thread or Nightshade's thread or whoever's thread and make a big stink, do I?

No, but you aren't a troll.
>> No. 9326
>>9324
Eh, faggots will be faggots.
>> No. 9327
>>9324

No, BUT I DO. Intellectual Checkmate, etc.

9 sucks, Sukima is shit. Hail to HLA, the only one that has halfway decent h-scenes. I'm sick and tired of these fucking long ass storylines!
>> No. 9328
>>9313
The story is fine. If you need a break at any time while writing it just take one, but remember to mention that you'll be disappearing for a bit.
>> No. 9332
ITT: 0/10 Trolls
>> No. 9333
ITT The inevitable.
>> No. 9334
You know what? I like HLA and AoD. They make a good contrast, since HLA is a fapfic with no GRIMNDARK, and AoD is a story that, in my opinion, is already guaranteed some GRIMNDARK. And they both have great characterisations. An example of a character that Nine has, again in my opinion, done better than anyone else has is Renko. Patchwork has already written more for HLA, so I like a lot of his characterisations, but I like his Yuyuko and Ran the most.

tl;dr Nine and Patchwork are both great writers that need to keep writing.
>> No. 9335
>>In fact, because of my poor skills in writing/making something good

Dammit Nine, stop putting yourself down. Write! I WANT TO READ AoD.
>> No. 9336
>>9335

listen to this man
>> No. 9340
>>9335
Have you lost your mind HY?
Must have been drinking shitloads of Rum again and don't know whats going on anymore.
>> No. 9341
>>9313

No, no, please continue AoD, we can be patient, really. Traps and Touhou are two of my favorite things. Aoi, penis, cute, etc.
>> No. 9342
Two questions for the fucktards that are saging this and calling it shit.

1. Did you know that this isn't BC/R?

2. If you hate this, then why're you even here? To be a hilarious troll? To cause shit just because you're pathetic, elitist assholes?

Give me a break. Try reading something before you call it shit.
>> No. 9343
>>9340

0/10
>> No. 9344
It's about time you quit writing. I haven't bothered with reading this, but I'm sure that it's horrible.

Now Patchwork officially has his own board. Cheers.
>> No. 9345
>>9344

Great. An entire board for him to not update in.

Kill yourself, namefag.
>> No. 9346
>>9344

Huh. This makes me think.

Patchwork? What do you think about all of this? Do you even read AoD? Why do/don't you?
>> No. 9349
>>9346

I do indeed read AoD. I like it, and happen to think that old Nine has done much better with it than with the Border Crossing stories. I would personally like to see it continue, as I find it entertaining.

Also, traps are delicious.

More importantly, as much as I like having my cock sucked, I'm going to have to ask some of you to take it out of your mouths. Frankly, you don't know where it's been. That aside, I am oft irritated by seeing most any story here trolled, and more so when my name is dropped in the process. If you're going to troll, then don't involve me, no matter how much you might love writefag powerlevel debates.
>> No. 9359
>>9349
>>Also, traps are delicious.

This man is wise. Listen to him.
>> No. 9366
>>9344
ಠ_ಠ
>> No. 9372
Status report. Apparently I have been doing okay with Aria. (At least judging from what replies don't look like trolls) So I'll get back to writing in about a week.

The bad news is that my computer's cord was only one problem. I'll have to go get the actual computer fixed soon, so it may actually be more than a week before AoD continues.
>> No. 9379
>>9372
>Apparently I have been doing okay with Aria.
Gee, we only told you this since, like... it fucking started.
There had better be a wall and a Futako-sensei x Aoi h-sidestory when you get back.
>> No. 9380
>>9372

What >>9379 said. You think we'd be CONSTANTLY TELLING YOU TO GET THE FUCK BACK TO WORK if we didn't like it? The fact that you get more votes than half the damn CYOAs on the boards should be proof enough.
>> No. 9405
Okay, it'll be a while before I can write again, so I was wondering; what do you all think of AoD so far?
>> No. 9406
File 121882927928.jpg - (53.27KB , 220x151 , ayayayaya.jpg ) [iqdb]
9406
>>9405
GET BACK TO WORK
>> No. 9407
>>9405
I think it's great. Maybe a little slow paced, but that's a good thing. I'm not a big fan of traps either, but you can't please everyone, and I'll still read and vote. Seriously, just keep writing!
>> No. 9413
>>9405

Stop lazying around, you know what we think of AoD already, it's superb anf awesome, just get back to writing!
>> No. 9414
>>9407
>Maybe a little slow paced, but that's a good thing
>little
>good thing

ಠ_ಠ
>> No. 9415
>>9405

Most important difference I think is that while the main character is a trap, the tone is much less exploitative than it was in Border Crossing. The moody, horror/suspense thing you've got going on here is much more suiting to a serious /border/ LA--wherein Yukari is not just a plot device, but central to the story.

I liked the pre-game, though some of the school characters felt a bit extraneous. Renko as best friend is the perfect plot hook for the main character, while Mary definitely comes off as Yukari-like & villainous, as I think was intended. Regardless, you definitely fleshed out the two canonical border crossers and made them important to the narrative, as opposed to say their (usually solely) facilitative part in /shrine/.

The inventory could use an overhaul; there's simply too much stuff to look up everything specifically, but it might be managed by assuming the character has more knowledge than the player does and forcing review when necessary through flashbacks or asides. Maybe write some past diary entries in another thread as supplementary material so that the main character plays less like an amnesiac.

tl;dr: while BC/BCR was shit, these plotton fields are bountiful and ripe for picking. SO GET BACK TO WORK, NIGGER.
>> No. 9418
>>9405
I can't tell if you really haven't been reading all these comments or if you just want to hear it again, but either way you're doing a fantastic job with the story.

Don't let your old reputation get you down, if that's what's happening. A lot of people remember you as "The guy who wrote BC", and can't accept that people get better with practice and with time, like you have.

If the quality starts to slip, you'll see it in the voters, and hopefully you'll see it by yourself. Just don't take your own opinions too seriously, because if you let yourself you'll stay on the same post for weeks. People have told you more than a few times now that your writing has improved greatly, (And it has) that the story is a lot of fun, (And it is) that the atmosphere and the characterizations are enthralling, (And they are) and to GET BACK TO WORK NIGGER (And you should.)

Seriously. Whether you're attention whoring or honestly that insecure, it's starting to get annoying. Believe, self, etc.
>> No. 9419
>>9414
Not the update speed, the flow of the story. Try reading it from the beginning, you'll see what I mean.
>> No. 9424
I think the diary side-thread was an excellent part of BCR. It could be extremely good as a way to flesh out the story without interrupting the suspense or flow.
Be sure to bring it back.
>> No. 9425
>>9419

Oh, right. Guess I should pay more attention when reading.
>> No. 9538
Gave up on this already?
>> No. 9540
>>9538
Nine wants to write, but he is too busy wasting his time.
>> No. 9541
No one reads this anyway
>> No. 9542
>>9541
And you're no one, so that's that!
>> No. 9543
>>9541

derp
>> No. 9544
>>9541

hurr
>> No. 9545
>>9541

<- LAE is two boards that way.

Next time make sure you're in the right story, and, for that matter, the right board.
>> No. 9569
>>9541

What's up with all the shit trolling lately? Sure, BC/R sucked, but AoD is actually good, and people actually read it.
>> No. 9748
Just a notice here. I won't be able to continue AoD properly until I have all my notes back, and those happen to be on my old computer, which has a fucked up hard drive.

So, until I buy a new hard drive to transfer the memory to, no updates. That's all.
>> No. 9751
>>9748

Just one more excuse in the long line of excuses Nine has used to not write.
>> No. 10042
>>9748
>on my old computer, which has a fucked up hard drive
>buy a new hard drive to transfer the memory to
Memory? What the fuck are you talking about? How can you transfer the data if the hard drive is broken? If you can access it, why can't you copy it to a USB drive or something?
>> No. 10043
>>10042

Er, yeah. I was rather tired when I typed that up. I had meant to say that the motherboard was dead, not the hard drive.
>> No. 10044
>>10042
I'm trying to get him to do exactly that. I'd even be willing to send him a damned USB hard drive enclosure. Spending $8-$12 is worth it to see AoD get back on track.
>> No. 10045
File 12206478645.png - (156.06KB , 448x530 , 1209192439247.png ) [iqdb]
10045
>>10043
right, of course that's what you meant
>> No. 10060
<huh> I just make shit up as I go along.
<[9]> I make notes of what has and will happen.
<%Kiriko> me too
<%Ranmilia> Same as Mode here. I have a ton of plans, but they're all in my head.
<[9]> But I try to keep up with the Inventory.
<[9]> Which is actually the only part I can't remember.
<%Kiriko> I use backlog to check the inventory.
<%Kiriko> because I remembered when I add stuffs in and such

* [9] is now known as Houraizzzan
<@Kapow> so you can remember what you had planned?
<Houraizzzan> Uh, yeah.
<@Kapow> and what's happened already?
<Houraizzzan> Oh fuck.
<PaperBoy> THEN WHY AREN'T FUCKING WRITING?!
<Houraizzzan> I should be asleep.
<@Kapow> so you DON'T NEED YOUR MOTHERFUCKING NOTES?
<Houraizzzan> ...No.
<Houraizzzan> Other than my inventory notes.
<Houraizzzan> I can't go on without them.
<@Kapow> JUST REREAD THE STORY AND SEE WHAT WE PICKED UP
<Houraizzzan> Fuck no.
<@Kapow> FOUR FUCKING THREADS
<@Kapow> how long would that take?
<@Kapow> a lot less time than it takes your made up computer problems to get fixed, obviously
<%Mode> lol Nine busted his own lies.
<Houraizzzan> But my motherboard IS busted.
<@Kapow> you mean hard drive
<Houraizzzan> On my good computer.
<Houraizzzan> No, that was a fuck up.
<@Kapow> I thought your notes were on your laptop?
<@Kapow> that's your "good computer"?
<@Kapow> or did you misspeak then, too
<Houraizzzan> It's a super laptop.
<%Kiriko> someone write AoD for him please.
<Ataisai> SUPERTOP
<%Kiriko> see if he can be inspired.
<@Kapow> of course
<Houraizzzan> Fuck you, Kirin.
<%Mode> No, Nine, fuck you.
<@Kapow> so you're getting a new motherboard for your laptop?
<Houraizzzan> No, Mode, fuck you.
<Houraizzzan> Yessir.
<%Kiriko> Nine fucks everyone~
<%Kiriko> Nine is such a slut~
<@Kapow> what brand?
<Houraizzzan> I forgot.
<Houraizzzan> Anyway, sleep.
<Houraizzzan> Zzzzzzzzzzzzz